逃避

work, the solution to all problems. troubled, just pour in every once of energy into work. overtime? not a problem, just another method to waste the time away and not think about the problem. fully focused, 100% concentration on work, just work. til one becomes so engrossed in the whole process, one doesnt even have time to contemplate and reflect upon the original problem. it could be described as an escape rope, a way to run away and not confront the issue, but everyone has their own methods. some people choose to go out for a run, work out in the gym, go out with friends, have a drinking spree, go shopping, etc. me? i just work.

its becoming more of a welcome escape route, a convenient excuse. just work and work and work until the body becomes automated, the brain switches off, and at the end of the day, one just becomes so engrossed, so tired, that the whole schedule for a day becomes, work, sleep, work.

but now, even problems would arise from work. so such happens. fucked ups, screw jobs, bullshits, blah blah blah. it takes immense self control, not to mention several packs of ciggerettes a day, just to keep myself from tipping over and exploding like a bloody supernova.

他妈的， 我真的好想跑去海边好好的大声地大喊一场。。。。。把所有的烦恼，统统地把她喊出。。。。